Just when I thought maybe, just maybe, my career in dating was over – nope – I am back at square one.
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Let me sum up dating for you, especially if you are one of those, “love at first sight and you got married to your first crush folks”.
It’s like learning to ride a bike.
You start with a big wheel or tricycle and that goes well for a while. You can’t fall far off of those. They are easy and get you from point a to point b in a relatively short period of time. It’s kinda clunky, doesn’t really match your outstanding personality though. Nevertheless you stick with it. Determined to ride and be a part of society. You know, like your friends. You don’t want to be the last one without a bike.
Everyone has one.
Then you see your friends, they graduated from those mini movement machines. They have…two wheelers, with training wheels.
You want one. Shit. How did everyone move on so quickly. We were a pack, a pack of single women who were loving our long rides together…now I am left behind.
So, you dump the tricycle or big wheel and go looking. You find one, it is new and shiny. Has a bell and pretty streamers coming from the handlebars. So, you get on the new bike. You try it out. It’s a bit wobbly at first. Not what you were expecting. However it is fun, new, exciting and an upgrade from the big wheels you started with. You keep riding your two-wheeler with training wheels. Until it isn’t a fit anymore. Why doesn’t this work? Maybe because everyone else has taken their training wheels off. Could be the streamers are getting dirty or simply because it just doesn’t feel right. You aren’t as excited to ride it like you once were.
Do you stick in your comfort zone and keep riding what’s easy and comfortable? No. You build up all the gusto and strength you have to move forward. You don’t want to hurt your training wheels, as they may come in handy in the future, but for now – adiós training wheels, mama needs something shiny and new.
So, you start looking.
- Do you want a banana bike?
- What about a Schwinn?
- How about a BMX?
- Mountain bike?
Is there a Facebook quiz that will tell me what kind of bike I should be looking for?
You do what lots of others did. You take out an ad. One for a new bike. I decide I want a bike that makes my stomach have butterflies after our first meeting. I want a bike that gets me from point a to b, quickly. A bike that likes taking me to dinner, movies, hockey games, theatre, parks, museums. This bike needs to be shiny and sleek. I don’t want a project, I want a bike that I can start riding the minute I take it home. Does this even exist?
Many bikes out there claim to be that awesome diamond in the rough. The two-wheeler of my dreams. At first glance, maybe they are. Then, after trying it out, I likely return it within its 90 day, no questions asked guarantee.
I’m still looking. Looking for that perfect bike. One that will go on long rides with me to the park, take a break to enjoy the scenery and be trusted and reliable. That bike is out there, I just need to keep looking.
Dating is not for the faint of heart. When you are a person who has feelings and cares, you don’t ever want to hurt someone. So you hold them at arms length and don’t let them close, but don’t really cut them off either.
Until the next shiny bike shows up…
In case you wondered, I am still looking. My latest round of dating, well let’s just say I managed to crash and burn that as quickly as it started. I don’t get to pass go or collect $200. Instead I sit over on start and wait for my next turn.
He was a good guy. Kind, sweet and treated me well. I just got hung up on small and petty things – I didn’t want a project.
I wanted a ready to go, no problem relationship.
That didn’t happen.
Share with me your dating stories.
I need a good laugh.